The Old Quilt

An update.

At the beginning of this year my best friend went to Australia. I blogged about it then, when we knew she was going. You were all so kind, since many of you had shared experiences, and were perhaps blogging as part of that very reason. So many of you are far from where your friends and family live. I thought I'd do an update on how I have found it.

Well it has been crap! Really crap! I can't say I am depressed, as I know I'm not; but it has been like a grief. Not a real grief as we talk and email, but a real grief in that I have lost a lifestyle and nearness that I had with her. I lost the outlet for my gardening/craft conversations, and I lost that feeling of how much she enjoyed being there. She really enjoyed me (weirdly).

Generally she came to my house on a Saturday, not every Saturday, but when it suited us both. She would struggle in with her two boys and her M&S 'bag-for-life' bags, full of interesting things for lunch and a treat for the kids. The kids would head off to play and we drifted between the kitchen and the table at our big window. The cafetiere got a bit of hot action and it was coffee and green tea (usually alternating) with some ginger or flakemeal biscuits. I would have a pile of magazines/books from the library/ Amazon to look at, and we would peruse pages of crafts and vintage stuff for quite a while. A lot of the times I had made chicken and veg soup, so we would get that organised and my husband would come in for lunch. A bit of banter would start, and they would spend lunch-time catching up. Invariably there were rolls with ham, and hummus, rocket and olives.

ometimes

Sometimes we did craft in the afternoon, sometimes we just sat and chatted about clothes/ what we would buy for Christmas/ what would we plant next. A lot of plans. Just a very normal friendship.

Saturdays have been the hardest. I have never really enjoyed Saturdays at our farm. My husband always works and I felt trapped (with the children), even though I was free to do whatever I wanted (with the children, and they were all quite young then). Saturdays were often quite boring days where I would try to do a bit of housework, do some messages, and I ended up feeling they were sort of non-days. But if my friend was coming, or if I was going to see her, there was a warmth about Saturday. I knew I would be talking about crafts and veg growing, etc.

So Saturdays returned to what I had before, except there was an even bigger gap. My other friends generally do family stuff on Saturdays, so it doesn't feel right to get involved with that. When I think about those first few months, it was all a bit bleak. Thursday night craft nights were great in some ways but she wasn't there either. And there is that feeling too that I shouldn't be feeling this way. Nobody was dying, I was still in touch with her; and that niggling feeling that I might just be being a bit pathetic about the whole thing.

Even worse was knowing what she was going through, coping with the move and having no time to catch up with friends in Australia, or to make new ones. Even if I got an email a week it felt sporadic, as I was desperate for news. And we were both so sad. It was much worse for her though. Leaving her whole life behind.

I do have some really good friends, and it took a while to realise that I could get a fix of bits and pieces from various friends. Craft and black humour from my lovely neighbour friend, general warmth and laughter from another local friend, shopping-talk and quirkiness from my Canadian friend....and so on. Meeting some of my childhood friends too over the past year has reminded me of that lovely feeling of history. I have enjoyed that.

However, I still find myself driving to work a bit tearful as I have seen a car similar to my friends, I still check my inbox every day. I desperately miss her saying 'well hello there'.

I love Thursdays, Fridays and Sundays.

But I hate Saturdays.

Except last Saturday, when we went to Glenveagh Castle in Donegal on our 12 year wedding anniversary. That is where the outdoor photos are from. Aren't they just fabulous?

I have to credit my hubby for being so understanding this past year. There were lots of very long hugs and wet shoulders! Excuse the red eyes in the photo above, I just couldn't be bothered to edit it when I discovered it needed it. Not from crying though, so at least there's that!

So I am appreciative of what I have got, and more importantly, of what I have had, as those memories are so precious now.

 

If you want to feature your house in a magazine.......

..there are some important aspects to consider. Not that I am going to, you understand. I don't fit the criteria I'm sure. But I read a hell of a lot of these magazines and there seems to be a certain formula.(Certain exceptions such as The Vintage Magpie do apply).

First of all you need to say lots of happy things like...'We're so happy here', 'Finally we have our dream home' or 'I can't imagine living anywhere else'. Disregard the fact that this house is going up for sale very soon and the mileage from the magazine will add on a bit of worth. They never say, 'This ruddy house was so stressful we're getting divorced'.

It's important to find things. For example it's imperative to uncover victorian fireplaces behind walls, intricate spindles that were boxed in on the staircase, and there is usually an amazing original tiled floor under the carpet (which incidentally you must rip up). The quote will go something like this; 'when we ripped up the carpets we discovered a beautiful parquet floor which we lovingly restored'.

You should accept as normal; bowlfuls of lemons, limes, aubergines or oranges with their leaves still attached (since they were obviously picked that morning from your orange tree in your garden). A cafetiere is imperative and bonus points for croissants and Bonne Maman confiture! You are obviously mid meal and it's never a Domino's pizza.

Oh and you should be in your bare feet standing in your kitchen nursing your cup of coffee, or sitting in your living room reading a magazine (instead of scurrying round like a madwoman trying to hide your basket of dirty laundry.

Your TV should... well you don't have one; as all sofas face each other. We all know that nobody watches TV now, we sit opposite each other and talk.

If your children aren't cute you need to borrow someone elses. They also have no shoes, and are usually wearing something floral, unless you are a boy, in which case you will be wearing long shorts and a rather funky T-shirt. To the childrens' distress all their plastic toys will be hidden in the attic and the only things displayed will be their Elmer suitcase, a wooden dog on a stick, and a Tin Tin poster.

Beds should have at least forty-seven cushions on them, and a strategically folded throw along the bottom. There is never a toilet roll left on the bed head. That would reflect reality, and therefore be silly.

Now why do I keep buying the damn magazines?

 

 

Thrifting magic

I had a great time over the summer visiting my local charity shops. I was on the look out for some old woollen blankets but no such luck. I did find some other great stuff though.

This  'book' was on the bottom shelf, and when I lifted it I discovered it was a book of wrapping paper. But not ordinary wrapping paper; completely bonkers floral wrapping paper. I just love it. There are only a few dodgy designs and only two sheets had been taken out.

I also loved this simple flower bowl. At first I thought I would use it for a bedside watch and rings 'depositer'. But I think it looks better just empty. I think it was £1.

I haven't watched this yet but I think this is going to be quite inspirational when I get back to my own house, and start thinking about sorting out the garden. Geoff Hamilton was such a lovely man and I love his ethos of doing things for 2p!

The two pudding bowls were 39p each. I don't seem to tire of these size of bowls (or of jugs but that's a different matter entirely).

I did also get two pictures, but I'll show you those another day.

This weekend I am going with two friends on a thrifting day. I can't wait as I know it is going to be one of those days where we cackle a lot. No other word could describe it better. There will be a lot of giddiness, a long lunch, and lots of rummaging too!

I hope you have all had lovely weekends, I'm going to catch up with a few of you now.

From this....

to this!

Adding on a proper 2nd storey makes a hell of a difference!

And for the first time ever, we can see from upstairs in our house. We did have an upstairs before, but it was a converted low ceilinged space.

And do you see the middle window upstairs. That is my craft room. I. Cannot. Wait.

We have moved to our temporary house, whilst we get our renovations done, and I have to say, it has been easier than I thought. I do like having less belongings (we have a 40foot container holding the rest of our stuff). My eldest has been quick to point out that we have 5 less rooms now in this house. Yet we are swinging along nicely. However I do notice that if I don't keep on top of the tidying things look bad really quickly. So, I'm running a tighter ship here. Granted it involves a bit of shouting.

I am loving the new house renovations. We go to visit fairly regularly and it is all coming on well. The look is that of a traditional Irish farmhouse. Our builder is still saying we'll be in for Christmas, but I'm not so sure! I don't want a stressful Christmas so if it isn't finished well beforehand I'm staying put.

We had a 5th birthday party at the end of August. Instead of a cake, (and also instead of party bags come to think of it) each child decorated a bun, chose a candle they liked (I had all these semi-burned candles from previous years), and we built a sortof pyramid cake. my guess is that Nigella would have been very proud. The gaudy mess of it just looked fab!

The other thing that has happened is that the said 5 year old then started school, so now all three are dropped off in the morning. I didn't shed a tear strangely, we were both ready for it. I think it would have been worse if I was at home all the time.

Finally, I am on a health kick and it is going brilliantly. I am going to weightwatchers, and it feels right. I got to my goal weight with them a few years ago, and it all slipped back on again. I have tried other things but weightwatchers is the only thing that has really worked for me, I just have to crack the maintenance bit. There's something about a new term that just makes me get organized and motivated. I know I'm not the only one there. It's good to be back.

I have a few confessions

Sometimes, when the children are out, I throw out things that I think they don't need anymore.

I am very selective about which artwork I keep (after display).

I use television to babysit my children (yes I am in the house when I do this).

I take my children to McDonalds.

I once sent a big bucket of small blocks to the childminders, as I was sick of picking them up at my house.

I feel similarly about playdough.

I confess I am normal.

However last night I camped in the garden with my three. We had a feast, read a long story, listened to music, larked about, took photos, and had a great time. Balance is restored.

Nine days away!

I never knew Wales was so beautiful!Four wonderful days of touring about, a few long  boozy dinners with my cousin who we visited, and just spending time with my husband.

I never thought I would get to go to Centerparcs (Longleat)and cheaply at that. Well I have been beside myself and it was absolutely brilliant. Just to see the kids swimming improve was amazing.

I did know that lions mated quite a few times a day, but didn't realise they would do it in front of three small children. (Longleat Park)

We have had a wonderful time. Absolutely the best holiday. No photos as I am wading through housework and washing.

Beach talk

I have had such a lovely few days in Donegal. Just after Easter we all went to Kerrykeel, to spend the Monday and Tuesday there. We then went back down on the Friday to the Sunday. We discovered some new beaches, had a barbeque, sorted out the flower beds, cooked very little for a change, and lit the wood burning stove.

The amazing thing was that I think we really started to chill as soon as we got there. And it was so lovely; about half an hour after getting there we heard a 'Halloooo' from downstairs. It turned out my best chum from school days was staying nearby, in Portsalon, and she had checked our house on the off chance of us being there.

It was really good to catch up, and within a few hours we were all sitting in the pub in Portsalon, she with her husband and three children, us with our squad; looking out to sea and drinking Guinness. The kids have a favourite drink called 'Football Special' which is made in nearby Ramelton and is like a cross between cream soda and Iron Bru. It is really nice (good for hangovers I believe). You couldn't want more than a bag of crisps and a Football Special if you are a kid (or a hungover adult).

I had been quite inspired (or should I say frantic) by 'Big bucket girls' discovery of so many starfish on her local beach. She had blogged about it, and I was quite desperate to see some on our beaches. She said it was their breeding season. I love starfish and we have found a few over the past two years. So off we went, all starry-eyed, peering into lots of pools, and into every crack and cranny.

Well I am mystified. Not one did I see, which leads me to conclude that Irish starfish are quite bashful and conduct all antics during breeding season in a very deep dark crevice, away from prying eyes. A bit like Irish people, unless they have had too many Guinness, and not enough 'Football Specials'.

Those Welsh starfish have no shame.

Kerrykeel, Donegal

Would you mind going over to a blog I have created to advertise our house in Donegal? I am hoping that the blog, since it is free, will do instead of a website and will help us to rent it out. I could do with some constructive feedback. It's at www.relaxinkerrykeel.blogspot.com

When we first had the house, I knew the plan was to rent it out, but I wasn't sure how I would feel about it. Now two years later I am content with the thought of it. We don't use it enough just to keep it sitting there. The farming keps us at home a lot. And it is lovely, really it is. My sister said; "people will just love that place the minute they step into it, it is just stunning". Well, I was stunned, she doesn't throw the compliments about much.

So the website is done, I have leaflets printed out; now we just need our first punters. Any help, advice or feedback would be greatly appreciated.

I am hoping to get down there over the next few days, just to get down to the beach, take a few more photos, get the stove on for a while, and plan what wildflowers to grow this year. I hope you have a lovely Easter.

Grrrrr

Do you know what I hate?

I really, really dislike toilet cubicles that are really narrow, and they put one of those stinky bins wedged up between the wall and the toilet seat. Even if your bum isn't that big, and mine is 'fairly' normal, it is difficult not to touch the stinky bin.

Designed by a woman?

I THINK NOT.

 

Also, whilst I am on this topic, I really hate hand dryers that aren't sure. You know what I mean you stick your hand under them and they go on...then off, then quickly on for a quick burst...then off again. So you actually dry your hands by the motions you make trying to get the fecking hand dryer to SENSE you are there. It should 'know' that yes your hands really are there, and there is someone else standing waiting to use it too!

 

....and breathe......

Just listen

Aw, I cannot get enough of this song from Snow Patrol. Just listen to it, and then listen to it again. Can you picture the room, the cold radiator, the love filled lyrics are just so innocent and filled with longing and remind me of very early days with my man. So heady and romantic!

Note that the 2nd verse does not describe a child hammering on the door demanding cheerios, or that they figure out how to unlock the stupid door and cry as you shout at them to go away!

Thank God for weekend cartoons!

Went to see Snow Patrol last Monday night in Belfast. It was just amazing. Cannot use enough superlatives, honestly, try to see them in concert. It was a present from my husband, which must mean he loves me.

Hopefully though he'll not crack the shutters open wide. Ten watt bulb more like!

Now how did I end up doing this post?